evievane has written 15 posts for Real Life 50 Shades of Grey

5 “More” Reasons to Try Rope Bondage — Whether You’re Kinky or Not

Longing to be bound to the bedpost blindfolded? Or maybe being tied naked to a tree is more your cup of tea. If visions of bondage have been dancing through your head — or maybe just shyly peeking in before you firmly shut them out — this might help get them out of your head … Continue reading

5 Reasons to Try Rope Bondage — Whether You’re Kinky or Not

Forget hard-core kinky porn for a minute. You don’t need to be strung from the ceiling by a hook in your ass whimpering through a ball gag to get the benefits of rope bondage, in the bedroom or out of it. In fact, if your only exposure to bondage is through sadistic porn, you might … Continue reading

…and now we pause for a humor break

The rituals. The punishments. The intensity. The just plain old general…seriousness of D/s can make us forget that it can be fun too. Whenever I find myself stressing too much because I couldn’t fold his damn fitted sheets properly or worrying that he’ll punish me for forgetting to end every sentence with an honorific or whatever, … Continue reading

The Person Who’s “Really” in Control

He looms over you with the riding crop, watching you struggle, spread-eagled, against your wrist and ankle restraints. Will he be kind in his choice of landing spots, or will he choose to strike at the sensitive bare inner thigh or your even more sensitive pink parts? He looks cool and collected, in contrast to your flushed face … Continue reading

What to Change About Yourself to Attract Your Christian Grey

How many times have we heard, “Nobody’s perfect”? And as you embark on your quest for a dominant, it’s all too easy to feel like you don’t measure up to the other girls competing for doms’  affections. (Is it just me or does it seem like there are way more submissive women than dominant men?) Among the hordes … Continue reading

Real-Life Red Rooms

Christian’s Red Room (of pain/pleasure), as Ana calls it, is nicely outfitted with everything a girl could want for a kinky good time. But what if your dom can’t devote the space or a huge wad of cash to a room dedicated to kinky sex? Have no fear; it’s public and semi-public playspaces and dungeons to the … Continue reading

Caring Concern vs. Stalking

We’ve seen this scene countless times: the damsel in distress rescued at just the right moment by the dashing hero. And Christian rescues Ana more than once, “just happening” to be in the right place at exactly the right time. And it’s hot, right? Someone swooping in as the savior, taking responsibility for our safety. … Continue reading

Guest Post: FlamingJune on Sub Drop and Support

Evie and I were talking the other day, and she asked, “What are the top reasons people come to your group?” I have been running Submissive Safe Space (SSS), a discussion and support group for s-types in San Francisco, for the past four years. I thought of three topics off the top of my head … Continue reading

Dom, Sadist, Top, Daddy — What’s the Difference?

In the search for your own Christian Grey, you’ll no doubt run across a variety of types on the dom spectrum—and, as with most other character traits, most people aren’t purely one type. “Dom” is a broad term for anyone who feels more comfortable being dominant (that is, being in charge). Doms can also be … Continue reading

Christian Grey, Magical Mind Reader

He answers Ana’s unspoken thoughts. He’s always there when she’s in trouble. He seems to know what she wants before she herself knows. I’m calling major bullshit here. I mean, seriously, all that mind reading almost instantly? Totally unrealistic. After you’ve been with a dom for a while, it can certainly seem sometimes like he’s reading your … Continue reading

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